Archive - Apr 2009 - story

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I want you to win me a car

Ordinarily, I don't get to excited about contests, because I can read odds lines.

But I have a 1-in-10 chance of winning a new car, and you can help.

Short version? register here. Then vote for my canvas once a day until May 15. Thanks!

Long version? Nissan Canada is introducing a new compact car—the Cube—and they are promoting it mainly through online means. They picked 500 finalists in their "Hypercube" contest, and they're going to give cars to 50 of them.

Saskboy II: it's like being hated by a pomeranian, or maybe Warren Kinsella

I mean, yeah, you keep your fingers clear, but it's hard to take the threat seriously, you know?

I did give Mr. Boy the presumption of not being a developmentally disabled child (I merely said his insults were akin to those one would expect from such a source), but having read his latest attempt at thought and reason, I see that an apology is owed:

Attention developmentally disabled children: I was terribly unfair to your mental faculties previously, and I pledge that I will never do anything as risible as compare you to Saskboy again. It's pretty clear that if you were in a room with my debating partner, it would be he who was lowering the level of discourse.

At this point, I'm pretty sure Saskboy is doing my work for me. Here's his key points in that last post:

-The Roughriders mascot is a gopher.

Saskboy is a toolbag of raw toolage

I mean, just read this. It's like being insulted by a developmentally disabled child: sure, he's trying to be mean, but it's just sad.

I'm being insulted about our hockey team by a gent from Saskatoon? Seriously? A city that's not even grand enough to have had its pro hockey team leave town? That's right, Winnipeg and Quebec City look down on you because at least they used to have the Jets and Nordiques. At least you still have the Roughriders, a team whose name was re-used for an extra-tough condom, and whose mascot is, I kid you not, The Flame. I can't make this stuff up, folks, Saskatoon already made it up for me.

Oh snap! You mean the Roughies play in Regina? I take it all back: you don't have that going for you.

Ask not what blogging can...oh whatever.

I entered this contest. I'm one of the 500 finalists. Short version? Nissan will give 50 of those finalists a Nissan Cube to take home (Flash-ridden promotional website. Don't say I didn't warn you).

Yes, that's right, a whole darned car. I could use it, too.

Your part? You'll hear soon enough, but be assured, I will need your help, all 20 of you.

My part? Go to bed. I've done all I can tonight.